Hey Cake Fam!

Today is a post from my girl, Carleigh. If you’re new around here, Carleigh is the bread to my butter here at The Cake by Hannah. She helps me reel in my vision and crazy ideas to make them a reality. Every visionary needs a practical person who makes the steps, A-Z, to achieve said dreams. That’s Carleigh for me! Everybody needs a Carleigh! I always love when she says she has a word to share, and I know this will bless you all. A huge part of my own story is that I found out the whole system I believed I wanted and worked so hard for wasn’t what I thought it’d be, and it ended up destroying my soul hehe… But seriously. I wasn’t made for a desk and I felt ashamed by that for so long. I am team FIND WHAT BRINGS YOU JOY! But, there will always be hard work required. I fear that our generation CAN be the generation who wants all the things, but doesn’t want to put in the work. That’s not where I stand- not even close. You have to be willing to work the small jobs you didn’t want in order to get to the dream. I failed at that along the way, but thank goodness for a God full of grace.

So, here’s Carleigh’s story and how she figured out what works best for her! We believe in hard work, family first, and having fun all the way through. 

xoxo, Han

If you ask me, one of the most difficult parts of adulthood is finding your “dream” job. Navigating the many requirements and hurdles that come with getting your degree, the interview process, and starting a new job can be so overwhelming that if we become unsatisfied with what we’re doing, starting that process all over again seems so daunting that we often just settle. We settle for a job that’s comfortable, or guarantees a consistent paycheck, or even one that we hate just so we don’t have to take the risk involved with trying something new. Trust me, I get it. The point of this post is not to make you feel bad for where you’re at or tell you that you’ll only be happy in life if you’re in your dream job (although I think that certainly helps). What I want to do today is talk about some things that I’ve learned about myself and what I need out of a job, and then challenge you to do the same. Maybe you aren’t in a place right now where you can quit everything and chase after your dream of traveling the world, but maybe you can make a few small changes to optimize what you get out of where you are now or help you plan for what you need in the future.

First, identify your learning style. This is a quick and fairly accurate online quiz to take if you’re unsure! Even if you’re not in school, knowing your learning style is also important to being successful in your work. Do you need to discuss projects with others to work through them? Do you enjoy hands-on work or face-to-face contact with customers? Do you need lists and charts and as little face-time with others as possible? These are all needs that you can identify through knowing your learning style and are really important to consider in comparison to your job responsibilities!

Second, identifying your ideal work environment is crucial. This is one I learned the hard way. Because I can be very type-A and enjoy organization and planning, I thought I would thrive on a set schedule, in one building where I did the same thing everyday. Turns out- that was NOT for me. I need to be in an environment that changes and keeps my attention. I love to work in coffee shops with the bustle of people, background noise, and espresso machines running. Working in silence drives me insane, but I also need to be able to be alone when I want. I can’t be in a job where I have to be somewhere at a set time every single day and I can’t leave until a certain time. It makes me feel trapped and doesn’t allow me to work when I’m feeling focused or inspired. I love putting my headphones in and jamming to T Swift while I crank out my work. I love being able to meet up with Hannah to work so I can talk about my ideas and get her feedback. I love getting my fav Starbucks drink and people watching while I work. These are things I need in a job- but what about you? What type of environment do you need to focus best? Quiet? Background noise? Someone to talk to while you work? A place where you can get up and take breaks or leave and come back? Figuring this out will help you be more productive and might show you what type of job would be best for you.

Because it took me such a long time to figure out what I wanted to do for a job, I’m so passionate about helping others figure it out for themselves too. I also believe that I was able to be successful in school and now in my work because I took the time to figure out what I needed and worked best for me. Take even just 5 minutes today and ask yourself some of these questions I posed, or take the quiz if you don’t know your learning style. You are worth the time it may take to figure out what you need, and it may be just what you need to get fulfillment out of your job or career that you’ve been looking for.

Thanks for reading friends. I’d love to hear what you discover!

xoxo,

Carleigh

Today’s post is by Carleigh, and I am so grateful for her willingness to be open about her experience with counseling. I personally have also seen the power of counseling for personal breakthrough and freedom, and I can’t encourage you enough to see one yourself. There is no shame in seeking health of any kind. Nobody questions fixing a broken wrist or an off-set jaw. Nobody thinks twice about seeing a doctor when you have a cold or the flu. We are here to use this platform to shed light on something that IS NOT SCARY despite what the world has made us believe. To shed light on something that brings hope, beckons freedom, and can change your life. No matter how healthy or heavy you are in this season, I hope you are as blessed by Carleigh’s vulnerability as I am. I hope you see the benefit in seeing someone who can help you process what you are feeling and facing. There are seasons for seeing a counselor weekly and others where, like annual or quarterly check-ups, you maybe just need one once a month or every other. You and your counselor can decide together! xoxo, Hannah 

Happy Thursday, friends. Carleigh here. Today I want to talk about a topic that is very personal to me: counseling. While the topic of mental health is getting more attention and becoming more common to talk about today, I would say that there is definitely still a lot of shame and uncomfortableness around the subject. But I wanna shine a big ‘ole spotlight on counseling and say “This thing is awesome!! Everyone should do it!!”  Since there’s not one perfect person in this world, we could all use a little help… and that’s exactly what counseling is for. 

I chose to go to counseling, because I pretty much reached a breaking point in my life where I couldn’t do anything, felt lower than I ever had, and was having panic attacks that I couldn’t get a handle on. I was isolating myself more and more, and never felt like doing anything. It put a strain on pretty much every aspect of my life. I didn’t really understand what was happening to me, but I could see how it was negatively affecting my life in ways I wasn’t okay with and I wanted it to change. I ended up being diagnosed with anxiety and depression by my counselor, and part of my time in counseling was spent trying to understand what those things even meant. I needed someone to explain to me what those illnesses were and connect them to how I was feeling. I also knew that I wanted to get better, both for myself and for those around me, and I knew that I couldn’t get there by myself.  

If you think you’re ready to talk to someone but have zero clue where to begin, I get it. It’s scary enough to talk about the hard stuff, and finding the right person that you can trust with the hard stuff is almost enough to make you not want to do it. My advice is this:

1. Find someone that you feel comfortable talking to. Only you can decide who that person is. Start by asking around if you’re comfortable with that. Ask a friend or anyone you know that has experience with counseling if they can recommend someone. Ask your church if they know of a local counselor or if they have a program themselves. If you don’t want to ask anyone you know, just google counselors in your area! While there is nothing wrong with going to counseling, it’s understandable if you don’t exactly want to run around advertising that you’re looking into it. For me, I wanted someone that was a professional, qualified to help me, and that I wouldn’t run into at the grocery store. That is what I needed, but it may not necessarily be what you need.
2. Give it a chance and some time. Once you find someone, just go and try it out. If you don’t feel comfortable with that person, find somebody else! Keep searching until you find someone that you trust will help you in the way you need.
3. Study the difference between psychologist, therapist, and counselor. There are some different approaches, and depending on what you think you need, one may be a better fit for you than the other. Biblical counseling is a great place to start, but a licensed Mental Health Counselor also has the education and ability to diagnose and assist medically as well.

If it feels like you’re the only one that is going through something or needs help, let me lovingly tell you that you’re wrong. I have been there, and so have so many others. If walking into a counselor’s office is a scary start, then begin with a mentor who can direct you toward a counselor as you feel more ready. But, if we can encourage you in anything, start talking TODAY. Remove the duct tape that has covered your mouth in fear and start talking with someone you trust. Counseling is a wonderful thing that has changed my life for the better, and I’ll shout that from the rooftops if it encourages someone to give it a chance. Take care of yourself friends, you deserve it.

xoxo,

Carleigh